There once was a town named Pawnee. This town was full of
laughter, love, and happiness. The
citizen’s days consisted of church and family gatherings. All was well in this
little town but a darkness loomed nearby. A troll with teeth as big as the
citizens themselves was in a deep slumber. The terrible troll was named Baki.
The citizens had heard of his rulings every thousand years, but it was all a
distant worry. The distant worry would soon be a cruel, cruel reality…
Source: SodaHead
Baki stretched his long arms after waking from a thousand
year slumber. He was very hungry with an appetite for flesh. He performed his
ritual of sharpening his teeth and club. As he got ready for his upcoming
reign, he spoke words that boomed across the lands. “I’m coming dear Pawnee. Be
prepared.” The citizens shivered with fear for they were not expecting those
words to be spoken so soon.
Baki swept through the town with his mouth as wide as the
sea. He quickly went to the King and ate him with one swift bite. The livestock
and the occasion citizen fell into the depths of his mouth. The people ran with
fear locking their doors and turning off the lights. The attack continued for
the next week until Baki’s belly was completely full. Once he was finished, he
started his actual reign over Pawnee. The rule was for each family in the city
to alternate each week on offering the troll either eight cows, twenty
chickens, or one of the family members themselves. These were the rules, and
they would not be altered. One of the local families had neither chickens nor
cows, therefore they would have to sacrifice one of the children. This outraged
the town of Pawnee and news spread quick.
A nearby town heard of the terrible news. In the town
resided a family of five sons that were in hiding from something that no one
quite knew about. The youngest and strongest boy was named David. He thought of
all the people that were being affected by this cruel creature and felt
something needed to be done. He begged and begged his mother to let him go but
she resisted. David did not care what she said. Pawnee needed a savior and he
would be that for them. Later that night, David packed his sword, slingshot,
and rocks before sneaking out to Pawnee.
Source: David
After a fortnight of traveling, David arrived in the middle
of the city’s downtown. He stood firm with sword in hand and yelled out to the evil
troll. “Baki you have taken your last human. Your last chicken. Your last cow. And
especially your last breath.”
Baki jumped out of his makeshift thrown of cow bones. He
quickly jolted towards David a swung his massive club, barely missing David’s
head. As David ducked he took out his sword and attempted to stab the calf of
the troll. The rough hide of the troll snapped the metal sword in two. Baki
chuckled with a great laugh for he knew he had an easy win now.
“Ah young boy you are done for now. Give up now and I will
make it quick.” Baki continued his laugh, his mouth being spread open. David
saw his chance and took advantage of it. He took out the most rugged rock and
placed it into the slingshot. David pulled back with all his might and let go
of the rock, his last chance. As Baki chuckled, the rock went straight into his
mouth and lodged into the troll’s throat. As Baki choked on the rock, David
strolled up to him. “You have underestimated me my friend. People of Pawnee, you
are forever safe from this monster. No more sacrifices, only happiness!” The
citizens peaked out from behind their doors with smiles on their faces. As the
town became full of people, they chanted for their new hero. Their new King.
Author’s Note: The inspiration for this story was that of
the Mahabharata. The particular section in the Public Domain Edition was Bhima
and Baka. Bhima, the son of Pandu, defeats an asura named Baka in a nearby
town. This asura is reigning over the town. I chose to be similar to the
Mahabharata in that the troll desired sacrifices of animals and if not available,
humans. My inspiration for David was that of Bhima. I chose not to make him of
a noble origin to being with because I wanted a rag to riches type of story. He
differed greatly because at the end of the story Bhima was not chosen to be
king. Also, a major difference in my story and that of the Mahabharata is that
David’s (Bhima) mother wanted him to defeat the troll (asura). This is vital
because defying his mother brings a certain dynamic to the story. I am glad
that you read my take on the Mahabharata. Furthermore, David is sort of a take on David and Goliath.
Firstly, I was intrigued by this story because you named the town 'Pawnee', which is the name of the town in the show Parks and Recreation. Secondly, I liked how you described this troll and all the trouble he caused because I felt more invested in the story once I understood the exact conflict. Also, the pictures you included were helpful for me to visualize the story as I was reading it. Finally, I appreciate all the detailed references you included to the original story. You kept elements of the version you read, but spun it in a way that made more sense for your style. Excellent job!
ReplyDeleteI hope that I am not wrong in saying that you mixed some indian epics with the David and Goliath story from the bible. If so you did it very well. This was a really good story! Baki was described with such vivid detail I could picture him perfectly in my head. David’s mom is the epitome of a mother trying to protect her baby.
ReplyDeleteHi again!
ReplyDeleteThis story was a really interesting mix of so many different things. I got a biblical and Indian culture mixed vibe. Naming the town after the one from Parks and Rec was pretty cool (even if it was unintentional). I also enjoyed the pictures that you included in the story. They were properly placed and added to my mental imagery. David and his mothers relationship is very realistic. You did a wonderful job! :)